MORAL TALES
A Tapestry of Faith Program for Children
SESSION 11: DO NO HARM
BY ALICE ANACHECKA-NASEMAN AND ELISA PEARMAIN
© Copyright 2010 Unitarian Universalist Association.
Published to the Web on 11/8/2014 5:15:05 PM PST.
This program and additional resources are available on the UUA.org web site at
www.uua.org/religiouseducation/curricula/tapestryfaith.
SESSION OVERVIEW
INTRODUCTION
Non-violence is not a garment to be put on and off at will. Its seat is in the heart, and it must be an inseparable part of our very being. — Mohandas K. Gandhi
This session introduces non-violence as an aspect of goodness which is integrally connected with justice. While children are more ready to understand the expressions of violence and non-violence than the inner conditions that create these expressions, this session address both inner spiritual peacefulness as well as peaceful relationships within the world. As suggested by the 1948 quotation from Mohandas Gandhi which opens this session, you cannot have one peace without the other.
Through hearing a story in which a boy holds the well being of a bird within his hands, and playing a game in which participants are encouraged to think about non-violent responses to conflict situations, the children will be encouraged to be peacemakers. As a reminder of the importance of making choices that are grounded in Unitarian Universalist values, the children will make and take home bracelets with the initials, "WWUUD?" standing for "What Would A Unitarian Universalist Do?"
Reflecting the sixth Unitarian Universalist Principle, which promotes "the goal of world community with peace, liberty, and justice for all," this session draws on the Buddhist and Hindu notion of non-harm, or ahimsa. It is written, in the Buddhist Digha Nikaya, "Abandoning the taking of life, the ascetic Gautama dwells refraining from taking life, without stick or sword." This session also draws on Christian scripture: "Put your sword back into its place; for all those who take the sword will perish by the sword." (Matthew 26:52) The word "Non-violence" will be added to the Moral Compass poster.
GOALS
The session will:
LEARNING OBJECTIVES
Participants will:
SESSION-AT-A-GLANCE
Activity | Minutes |
Welcoming and Entering | 0 |
Opening | 2 |
Activity 1: Gems of Goodness | 5 |
Activity 2: Story Basket and Centering | 5 |
Activity 3: Story — The Answer Is in Your Hands | 10 |
Activity 4: The "In Your Hands" Ball Game | 16 |
Activity 5: What Would UU Do? Bracelets | 16 |
Activity 6: Clean-Up | 3 |
Faith in Action | |
Closing | 3 |
Alternate Activity 1: Candles of Joys and Sorrows | 10 |
Alternate Activity 2: Frogs and Lily Pads Cooperative Game | 10 |
SPIRITUAL PREPARATION
Read the story, "The Answer Is in Your Hands," a few times. Then take a few minutes to think about your answers to the following questions:
SESSION PLAN
WELCOMING AND ENTERING
Materials for Activity
Preparation for Activity
Description of Activity
As children enter, greet them and direct them to the table with the gemstones.
Ask the children to choose one, two, or three gemstones to represent acts of goodness that they did or witnessed since the last time they came to Moral Tales. If you wish, help focus the children on particular directions on the Moral Compass that you have posted, so far.
If any children are participating for the first time in the Gems of Goodness project, invite them to choose a notebook, write their name on it, and decorate it as they wish. Tell them they may also pick three gemstones to bring into the circle.
OPENING (2 MINUTES)
Materials for Activity
Preparation for Activity
Description of Activity
Gather the children in a circle. Light the chalice.
If some or all of the children are unfamiliar with the reading, teach it line by line. Then recite together:
Come into the circle of love and friendship.
Come into the community of justice and goodness.
Come and you shall know peace and joy.
Extinguish the chalice.
Related content:
ACTIVITY 1: GEMS OF GOODNESS (5 MINUTES)
Materials for Activity
Preparation for Activity
Description of Activity
Gather the children around the table where you have placed the cloth, the jar or vase, and the gemstones. Ask who remembered to keep track of acts of goodness in their notebooks.
Invite volunteers to stand up, and tell the group about an act of goodness they engaged in (or witnessed, if you have offered this option), and place the gem in the glass jar or vase.
Indicate the Moral Compass poster. Mention the virtues that the group has explored in previous sessions. Suggest that the children try to think of some acts of goodness related to these virtues, as they share their gems of goodness.
Encourage newcomers to join the sharing once they've had a chance to see what the other children are doing.
Use these guidelines to organize the sharing:
It is very important to avoid judging participants, either with criticism or praise. Avoid phrases like, "Great job!" or "You're fantastic!" which might encourage the children to compete to share the "best" act of goodness or to perceive that different acts of goodness have greater or lesser value.
Instead, listen carefully to what the children tell you. Help them identify the virtues their acts of goodness represent. When appropriate, indicate a word or phrase on the Moral Compass poster that fits the act of goodness. This will help the children learn to recognize a variety of virtues in a variety of forms.
After each sharing, you may say something like, "Thank you for sharing," followed by a summarizing sentence such as:
Your specific responses to the acts of goodness children share will help them feel pride, a sense of accomplishment, and their own empowerment as agents of justice and goodness.
If children are not volunteering, call out various types of acts of goodness, and invite children to come up if they experienced that particular kind of goodness. You may call out:
When the sharing is finished, remind the children to take home their notebooks and continue to keep track of their acts of goodness.
If you are planning to do so, remind the children that they may mark their achievement with a special celebration when the group has filled the glass jar or otherwise reached an established goal. If the group is approaching the goal, you may wish to brainstorm with them about the celebration. Suggestions might include having a special treat for a snack, or ending early to do physical games outside.
Whatever way you choose to mark the jar being filled, once it has been filled you may empty it and start over again.
Including All Participants
If any participants are not mobile, you or another child can accommodate by passing the jar. If a child is not verbal, you may wish to invite a participant to choose another child, or a co-leader, to read his/her acts of goodness from his/her notebook and place a gemstone in the jar.
ACTIVITY 2: STORY BASKET AND CENTERING (5 MINUTES)
Materials for Activity
Preparation for Activity
Description of Activity
Gather the children in a circle in your storytelling area. Show them the story basket. Say something like, "Let's see what's in our story basket today."
If you are using an altar as a focal point, take the cloth cover from the storytelling basket and drape it over the box or small table. If the cloth cover has a special story, such as who made it, where it comes from, or the meaning of any symbols on it, briefly share the story with the children. Tell the group that the items in the story basket will be placed on this altar or table after the children have passed them around the circle.
Take the story-related items from the basket, one at a time, and pass them around. Briefly name the various objects. Children may ask questions about some of the items, begin to tell stories about similar things they have seen, or wonder aloud why an object is included. Tell them the group can talk more about the items after the story. Make sure you invite them to do so once you have finished the story and follow-up discussion.
If you have a globe or a world map, indicate India , the source of this folk tale.
As items come back to you, place them on the altar. Objects that are fragile, or which should not be passed around for any reason, can be held up for all to see and then placed directly on the altar. Display the items for children to look at as they listen to the story.
Now remove the chime, rain stick or other instrument from the story basket. Tell the children that every time you tell a story in Moral Tales, you will first use the instrument to help them get their ears, their minds, and their bodies ready to listen.
Invite them to sit comfortably and close their eyes (if they are comfortable doing so). You may tell them that closing their eyes can help them focus just on listening.
In a calm voice, say, in your own words:
As you breathe in, feel your body opening up with air. As you breathe out, feel yourself relaxing.
Repeat this once or twice and then say:
Now you are ready to listen. When I hit the chime (turn the rain stick over), listen as carefully as you can. See how long you can hear its sound. When you can no longer hear it, open your eyes and you will know it is time for the story to begin.
Sound the chime or other instrument. When the sound has gone, begin telling the story.
Including All Participants
If anyone in the group is unable to hold or pass items, or cannot see the items, make sure you or a child in the group offers the person a chance to see and touch each object, as needed.
Some people do not feel safe closing their eyes when they are in a group. If any children resist, respect their resistance and suggest that they find a single point of focus to look at instead.
If you have a basket of fidget objects for children who will listen and learn more effectively with something in their hands, make the fidget object basket available during this activity. For a full description of fidget objects and guidance on using them, see Leader Resources.
ACTIVITY 3: STORY — THE ANSWER IS IN YOUR HANDS (10 MINUTES)
Materials for Activity
Preparation for Activity
Description of Activity
Before you begin, look around the room and make eye contact with each person. Read or tell the story, "The Answer Is in Your Hands."
Ring the chime (use other sound instrument) to indicate that the story is over. Pause for a moment. Then guide a discussion with these questions:
The object of this discussion is to encourage empathy for all of the characters in the story, while helping the children to understand and integrate the moral teaching.
Including All Participants
There are children for whom it is very difficult to sit still, even when they are paying attention to what is happening around them. This can be frustrating for teachers, as well as for the children who are expected to maintain stillness for prolonged periods of time. If you have children in the group for whom this is the case, consider adopting the use of "fidget objects" as described in Leader Resources. These fidget objects can provide a non-disruptive outlet for the need to move.
ACTIVITY 4: THE "IN YOUR HANDS" BALL GAME (16 MINUTES)
Materials for Activity
Description of Activity
Gather children in a circle. Say, in your own words:
The boy in our story wanted to prove his point so much that he was willing to kill a bird in order to do that. He was in a situation where he could decide whether the bird would live or die.
Every day we all make decisions to hurt or help the people, other living beings, or the Earth around us.
Ask the children to think of some examples. You may prompt them with an example of your own, or use one of these:
You can mention positive choices people can make to avoid doing harm, such as sharing, doing chores, saying kind words, petting your dog, or, like the boy in the story, letting the bird go free.
Tell the children:
Unitarian Universalists believe that we should have peace for everyone in the world. Sometimes when we're angry it's very tempting to do something hurtful to other people, but we can choose to do something peaceful that doesn't harm others, instead. The answer is in our hands.
Have everyone sit or stand in a tight circle with their hands behind their backs. Pass the ball (or stuffed bird) around the circle in this way so that no one can see who has the bird or ball. After a few moments, call out, "Peace!"
Instruct everyone to stop passing the ball or bird. Ask that the person who is holding it think of a non-violent solution to one of the conflict scenarios in Leader Resource, "In Your Hands" Scenarios. Tell the group:
There is only one rule. Your solution cannot cause harm to another living being.
If you want to take the time, you can solicit additional ideas from other participants. After you are done generating non-violent solutions, invite the children to resume passing the ball or bird behind their backs.
The goal of this activity is to encourage children to think of and name alternatives to violence in conflict scenarios that are commonplace at their age. They will envision themselves acting as peacemakers, as well as hear many ideas for peaceful resolutions to conflict from their peers.
ACTIVITY 5: "WHAT WOULD UU DO?" BRACELETS (16 MINUTES)
Materials for Activity
Preparation for Activity
Description of Activity
Settle children at work tables, Show them the newsprint you have posted with "WWUUD" and tell them they will make bracelets with this message on them.
Say, in your own words:
Every day we have to make choices about all sorts of things, like whether or not we will share, or be kind to a dog, or cut someone in line, or hit someone. We are going to make bracelets to remind us to think about the things Unitarian Universalists believe when you have these choices to make. When you find yourself in a situation where you are deciding what action you should take, and maybe wondering what is good, and what is fair, you can look at your bracelet and ask yourself, "What would a Unitarian Universalist do?"
Explain that the letters on the beads stand for the phrase, "What would UU do?" This has a double meaning, as "UU" means both what would "you" do, as well as "What would a Unitarian Universalist do?"
Distribute bowls of beads and lengths of lanyard, cord or wire. Help children secure the first bead in their bracelet by knotting the lanyard, cord or wire around it, leaving a tag on the end to finish the bracelet later.
As children finish their bracelets, you may say:
You can take your bracelets home and I hope you will wear them a lot. They may help you think about whether what you are doing will hurt someone, or help someone. When you look for the answer, look at your hands, and see this bracelet, I hope it will help you make good choices that are peaceful, loving and fair.
Including All Participants
If you have a child for whom small motor tasks are difficult, a leader or friend can help that child string the beads. You may also adapt this activity by providing large beads that are easier to string or providing a needle to help a child pull the lanyard through the beads.
ACTIVITY 6: CLEAN UP (3 MINUTES)
Materials for Activity
Preparation for Activity
Description of Activity
Invite the children to return the meeting space to being as neat and clean as they found it. Ask them to put away the materials used in the session. Remind the children that other people may use the space, and should be able to find it clean and ready to use.
Engage the children in thinking about materials that can be recycled. Specifically identify and assign any clean-up task that will help the children understand and accept their own responsibility as users of the meeting space. Use the clean-up activity to help children think about how their actions affect others and gain good feelings from participating in a group effort.
If your congregation has a recycling system, ask a child or pair of children to take the recycled materials to the bins. If your congregation does not have a recycling system, this may be a good Moral Tales project to initiate! In the meantime you might want to suggest that a different child each week take home a bag of recyclables. First, ask parents if they wish to participate in this project.
Including All Participants
All children should assist as able.
CLOSING (3 MINUTES)
Materials for Activity
Preparation for Activity
Description of Activity
This activity helps the children get used to practicing a closing ritual as a way of affirming their part in the faith community.
Gather the group in a circle. Thank the children for participating and sharing their stories and ideas in this session. Tell them something you liked about the way they worked together as a community.
Point out the Moral Compass poster. Say, in your own words:
Our Moral Compass shows us ways to make good decisions and how to be fair. Today we heard a story about a boy who had to decide whether he was going to kill a bird or set it free. When we are trying to make decisions about whether something would be a good or fair thing to do, one way to decide is to think about whether or not it hurts someone, including yourself. We're going to add "Non-violence" as a direction on our compass.
Post or write "Non-violence," on the Moral Compass poster.
Remind the children that the next time they meet they will have a chance to add more gems to the Gems of Goodness jar. If appropriate, remind them that when the jar is full of gemstones, you will have a special celebration. You may wish to encourage them to pay special attention to times when they are making a choice for non-violence, a choice that ensures they are not harming another living being or the Earth, as well as times when they have a chance to practice any of the other virtues on the Moral Compass poster.
Lead the children in singing Hymn 414 in Singing the Living Tradition, "As We Leave This Friendly Place." If the hymn is unfamiliar to some of the children, teach it line by line and then sing it once through together.
The song's lyrics are:
As we leave this friendly place,
Love give light to every face;
May the kindness which we learn
Light our hearts till we return.
Or, lead the group in once again singing "We're Gonna Sit at the Welcome Table," Hymn 407 in Singing the Living Tradition.
Distribute the Taking It Home handout you have prepared. If new participants need to take home a Gems of Goodness notebook and parent handout, make sure they have these. Thank the children, tell them you look forward to seeing them next time, and dismiss the group.
Related content:
LEADER REFLECTION AND PLANNING
Take a few minutes to evaluate the session with your co-leader immediately afterward, while it is fresh. Share your thoughts with any other team teachers and your director of religious education.
You might find it helpful to consider these questions:
TAKING IT HOME
Non-violence is not a garment to be put on and off at will. Its seat is in the heart, and it must be an inseparable part of our very being. — Mohandas K. Gandhi
IN TODAY'S SESSION...
We talked about the importance of making choices that bring peace and do not harm others. After hearing a story in which a boy holds the fate of a bird in his hands, we played a game in which the children had conflict scenarios "in their hands," and were challenged to name non-violent solutions. We also made "WWUUD" bracelets. These initials stand for the question, "What Would a Unitarian Universalist Do?" as a reminder to make choices that reflect our Unitarian Universalist values.
EXPLORE THE TOPIC TOGETHER. TALK ABOUT... Talk with your child about times when a conflict situation in your family has been resolved peacefully. Point out times when he or she has been a peacemaker, or share a story about a time when you handled a conflict non-violently. Talk about the strategies you each use to calm down and keep your temper under control.
EXTEND THE TOPIC TOGETHER. TRY...
A FAMILY RITUAL
Post the initials "WWUUD?" in various places around your home. Whenever a conflict situation or a morally questionable action arises in your home, ask one another, "What would U.U. do?" or, in shorthand, "WWUUD?" In order to help answer that question with Unitarian Universalist values in mind, take time as a family to learn about the Unitarian Universalist Principles and Purposes (at www.uua.org/visitors/6798.shtml). Set aside one evening a week and discuss each principle in turn at dinner time. Try to include everyone in a conversation about what the principle means, as well as how it should inform our choices and behaviors.
A FAMILY GAME
Make your own family version of the board game, Scruples. Using index cards, write down situations that require ethical thinking, such as whether or not to share your favorite dessert, whether or not to admit that you flushed the rubber ducky down the toilet and caused the overflow, or how to react when given a gift you do not like. Be sure to have situations that children might face. To play the game, turn the deck of index cards over and have each family member in turn choose a card and speak about how they would behave in the given circumstance. You can also bring the cards along to pass the time on long car drives or while waiting in restaurants. Encourage everyone to think about how Unitarian Universalist values influence their answers.
FAMILY DISCOVERY
Learn about peacemakers who have worked for justice using non-violent means. Study the lives of such great men and women as Jesus, Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King, Jr., Rosa Parks, Lucretia Mott, and Albert Schweitzer.
Read this Caldecott Honor book that tells the story of how Rosa Parks' bravery and perseverance inspired others to take up the cause of desegregation and brought about the Supreme Court ruling that segregation was illegal in the United States: Rosa by Nikki Giovanni (Henry Holt and Company, 2005).
These collections include many folk tales that reinforce peace:
Read a picture book that teaches that war is not a game: Playing War by Kathy Beckwith (Tilbury House Publishers, 2005).
Listen to Holding Up the Sky: Peace Tales for Kids (2003), an award-winning CD (at www.peacetales.org)of stories from around the world read aloud by New Mexico storyteller, Sarah Malone (2003).
Related content:
ALTERNATE ACTIVITY 1: CANDLES OF JOYS AND SORROWS (10 MINUTES)
Materials for Activity
Preparation for Activity
Description of Activity
Determine if your room and building policies allow for open flames. If not, consider doing this activity with a felt board and felt candles or with beads in a jar.
Begin by lighting a "starter" candle. Invite the children to come forward one at a time and light a candle of joy and sorrow from the starter candle and push it into the sand. The child should then face the group and tell them what the candle is for. Translate the language so they understand that we are talking about things that have made them very happy or sad.
Candles of joy and sorrow offer the opportunity for children to experience what is a weekly ritual in many Unitarian Universalist congregations. This activity can deepen sense of community in the Moral Tales group. It gives participants a chance to name those things which they carry in their hearts, encourages listening to others, and, in many cases, makes a link with the adult worship experience.
IMPORTANT: Do not leave burning candles unattended. When all who wish to participate have done so, blow the candles out and put the matches away in a safe place.
Including All Participants
If a child is physically unable to light a candle and stand to address the group, ask the child to invite another child to light a candle for him/her or offer to do it yourself. Allow the child to speak joys and sorrows from where he/she is sitting.
ALTERNATE ACTIVITY 2: FROGS AND LILY PADS COOPERATIVE GAME (10 MINUTES)
Materials for Activity
Preparation for Activity
Description of Activity
Say:
We are going to play a game of frogs and lily pads. All of you can be frogs. When the music is playing, you dance and hop around the lily pads as frogs like to do. But when the music stops, you must be on a lily pad.
Be careful, because you must keep everyone safe from the crocodile that lives in the pond. The crocodile can only eat frogs that are not on a lily pad when the music stops. If anyone gets eaten, the whole group loses the game.
After each round of music, remove a lily pad until the entire group is working together to stand on a single piece of newsprint. If this does not present enough of a challenge, you may rip the last sheet of newsprint in half.
Including All Participants
In many cases, children with limited mobility or sight or other disabilities can play this game if their peers are guided to make sure the child is helped to "safety" on a lily pad. Another way to adapt would be to ensure the child who cannot move ably or quickly is always near one of the remaining lily pads when you stop the music. Seven-, eight- and nine-year-old children can understand how they need to be physically careful of this particular child. Tell the group what they need to know about physical safety in this game, without calling undue attention to particular children's disabilities. A group that includes children with limited mobility presents a desirable opportunity for applying the concept of "non-violence" in this game.
MORAL TALES: SESSION 11:
STORY 1: THE ANSWER IS IN YOUR HANDS
Adapted from an Indian folk tale.
There was once a wise woman who lived by herself near a small village. Rumor had it that she could always accurately predict when the rains would come, or help heal a sick child with herbs, or calm angry neighbors and help them to resolve their fights and arguments. People came from all over the land to meet with her and seek her advice on matters both small and great. Her reputation was such that was said she was never wrong — not ever.
Some of the children of the village didn't believe that it was possible to always be right. Surely she could not know everything! They decided to test her knowledge. First they asked her to answer questions about the planets, the animals, and the world. No matter how hard the questions, she always answered correctly.
The children were amazed at her knowledge and learning and most were ready to stop testing the wise woman. However, one boy was determined to prove that the old woman couldn't know everything. Hatching a devious scheme, he told all of his friends to meet him at the woman's home the following afternoon so he could prove she was a faker.
All through the next day he hunted for a bird. Finally he caught a small songbird in a net. Holding it behind his back so no one could see what was in his hands, he walked triumphantly to the wise woman's home. (storytelling tip: take a wooden or stuffed bird and holds it behind your back.)
"Old woman!" he called. "Come and show us how wise you are!"
The woman walked calmly to the door. "May I help you?" she simply asked.
"You say you know everything — prove it — what am I holding behind my back?" the young boy demanded.
The old woman thought for a moment. She could make out the faint sounds of a birds wings rustling. "I do not say I know everything — for that would be impossible," she replied. "However, I do believe you are holding a bird in your hands."
The boy was furious. How could the woman have possibly known he had a bird? Thinking quickly he came up with a new scheme. He would ask the woman whether the bird was alive or dead. If the woman replied, "alive," he would crush it with his hands and prove her wrong. If she answered, "dead," on the other hand, he would pull the living bird from behind his back and allow it to fly away. Either way he would prove his point and the wise woman would be discredited.
"Very good," he called. "It is a bird. But tell me, is the bird I am holding alive or dead?"
The wise woman paused for a long moment while the boy waited with anticipation for his opportunity to prove her wrong. Again the woman spoke calmly, "The answer, my young friend, is in your hands. The answer is in your hands."
The boy realized that the wise woman had once again spoken correctly and truthfully. The answer was indeed in his own hands. Feeling the bird feebly moving in his hands as it tried to escape his grasp, he felt suddenly very ashamed.
The answer was in his hands — slowly and gently he brought his hands to the front of his body. Looking into the eyes of the delicate bird he apologized, "I am sorry little one," and he opened his hands to let her go free.
(Storyteller uses the sound instrument to signify that the story has ended.)
MORAL TALES: SESSION 11:
LEADER RESOURCE 1 IN YOUR HANDS SCENARIOS
Your younger brother has just destroyed an art project that you worked on for hours! You are furious and you feel like hitting him, or maybe destroying one of his favorite things. The answer is in your hands — what will you do?
A bully has demanded that you give her your lunch money. You are scared and angry. The answer is in your hands — what will you do?
Your cat just scratched you. You are bleeding, hurt and angry. The answer is in your hands — what will you do?
You have brought a juice box to the playground and now you are finished drinking it. The answer is in your hands — what will you do?
A kid in your neighborhood just hit your younger sister. You feel protective of her and angry. The answer is in your hands — what will you do?
Your dog chewed up your favorite stuffed animal. You are very sad and angry. The answer is in your hands — what will you do?
You are coming down the front steps of your school and there are a lot of older children standing and talking there, who are blocking your way. The answer is in your hands — what will you do?
You were picking a rose and you pricked yourself on the thorns. You are angry and feel like stamping on the rose bush. The answer is in your hands — what will you do?
There is one last cookie in the cookie jar. You and your older sister both want it. The answer is in your hands—what will you do?
You've had a bad day and someone on the school bus line pushes you and says, "Get a move on, stupid." You feel like screaming and hitting her. The answer is in your hands — what will you do?
There's a new kid in your class. Everyone hates him and your friends have been calling him names. The answer is in your hands — what will you do?
FIND OUT MORE
For group games and activities that reinforce cooperation and teach peace, see:
Holding Up the Sky: Peace Tales for Kids is an award-winning CD (at www.peacetales.org)of stories from around the world read by New Mexico storyteller, Sarah Malone (2003).
Read these collections of folktales that reinforce peace:
This picture book teaches that war is not a game: Playing War by Kathy Beckwith (Tilbury House Publishers, 2005).
Related content: